Is Higher Ego Flexibility Damaging Your Relationships?
Higher ego flexibility impacts one’s presence within relationships serving to weaken them. These people show much more respect for the thoughts, beliefs, and feelings of others and much less respect for their own. People can easily change their mind, even about important things. Often they seek the truth they believe to exist in others while failing to look within to find their own truth—humanly and spiritually. There is a hollow quality to their relationships in which they follow the lead of others, often blindly. Those with whom they are involved can sense this intuitively, if not consciously, which contributes to a reduced level of respect for the higher ego flexibility person. Unfortunately, this increases the potential for being manipulated, exploited, or abused by others as they often come under their “thought control” and have difficulty defending and asserting their own thoughts. The following excerpt from The Two Voices Within: Balancing the Energies of Ego and Spirit to Enhance Your Life presents the messages ego is telling the higher ego flexibility person, keeping them stuck in this energy. Messages they are listening to quite well but don’t realize.
You are to believe what others believe, think what they need you to think, and know the truth resides in others, from whom you must learn it. You must always question yourself and never question others. They will lead you to the truth that you cannot find within yourself. Their truth must become your truth. They possess greater ideas, knowledge, and beliefs which will not fail you. You can only fail by questioning them, which would endanger you and threaten your survival. You must stand firmly on their foundation and not your own. Theirs is built of stone and yours of sand. You are lost without their truth and can only know yourself through them. You must reside in the safety of their thoughts, as they define you and everything. They are your guides for how to best know, live, and survive in this world. Thus, you are safest when living in their world. You must lose yourself in order to survive.
When necessary, you must help other lost people to know their truth. They are also toiling in darkness. You must help them to see the light that others are showing you enlightening them on any and all earthly matters. The people you have come to trust know best and others must come to know what they know. Their light shines brightest and others will feel safest when they know their light. You will feel safest when others know their light. This affirms the truth upon which your guides stand. You must also view their convictions as a reflection of the truth upon which they–and you—stand. Conviction validates their truth for yourself and others. Those with lesser conviction are weaker, and they are only standing upon faulty thinking and beliefs. You must not listen to them.
You must, therefore, listen weakly to yourself and be suspicious of your own thoughts. You must not concern yourself with exploring what may be new, different, or unfamiliar in your own thoughts. You must keep such thoughts at a distance, as the truth does not reside within you. You are safest when thinking in the realm of what others know or want you to know. Their thoughts, words, and deeds must become yours. You are unified when you enter and become a part of their world, and you are protected within this unity.
You must listen intensely to those who are closest to you in order to gain their wisdom. Find only truth in their thoughts and words, and do not question them, as this would lead you astray and into darkness. Follow them so you can be close to them. This is when you are being the most loving. If you followed yourself, you would become separated and lost from them. Allow them to change you as needed, another way of showing your love for them and gaining their love in return. Your close relationships will survive best when you become most like them and least like yourself. Find yourself in your partner or other close loved ones.
You can love yourself most when embracing the thoughts of others while disowning your own. It is within the superiority of their thoughts that you can think well of yourself. The weakness and inferiority of your own thoughts would only cause you to think less of yourself—and potentially hate yourself. You must embrace others by adopting their thoughts in order to love yourself. Loving others more and yourself less in this way will ensure your daily safety and survival. Then you will pose no danger to yourself.
If the content from this blog resonates you may want to read further in The Two Voices Within (Chapter 4) to see if you are living any of the roles we discuss linked to higher ego flexibility energy (Child, Cultist, Loyalist, Unloved, Silent, or Puppet). It is when living these role some or most of the time that we are damaging relationships with others and ourselves. Complementary material for those who would like to heal and bring your higher ego flexibility energy into balance can be found in Ego Therapy: A Method for Healing Your Whole Self (Chapters 8 and 14) and EgoSpiritualism: Awakening to Your Human and Divine Self (Chapter 7). All three books in our trilogy are available as e-books on the Shop page here.
In peace and love,
Nick and Linda