Tag Archives: love

Is Higher Ego Power Damaging Your Relationships?

Is Higher Ego Power Damaging Your Relationships?

Lots of research has shown that a very important influence on wellness and the quality of our lives involves the relationships we experience. Relationships with our parents, children, spouse/partner, friends, co-workers, as well as with ourselves are a barometer as to how well things are going in our life –or not. For those with higher ego power the control of others is at the center of their relationships. They enjoy controlling the thoughts, emotions, and behaviors of others, particularly those closest to them. Frequently, they use manipulation, exploitation, and abuse—physical or psychological—to establish this control. Their needs come first and they bring self-absorption and narcissism into their relationships, which is destructive to them. The foundation for their higher ego power often involves exposure to permissive parenting where little if any effort was put into promoting self-control and recognizing the needs of others leading to an intense sense of entitlement. They learned that the world revolves around them and often it has.

One’s ego energy has an important say within the thoughts, words, feelings, and behaviors that occur within all relationships. The more our ego energy is imbalanced, the greater the chance that what we manifest with them is unhelpful and unhealthy—but often we don’t know it. The worse things are going in your relationships—which a person often fails to recognize—the “louder” is ego’s voice in your being. The following is an excerpt from The Two Voices Within: Balancing the Energies of Ego and Spirit to Enhance Your Life in which the impact of ego’s voice and higher ego power on relationships is presented.

Ego’s Voice

Through your power, I am helping you to dominate, control, or know more than others. You are to believe that listening to others is not necessary; that listening to others, thinking what they think, or doing what they do would be weakness, an experience that is foreign to you. Others cannot really know more than you do. Your way is right and doesn’t need to be challenged or changed—their does. Changing yourself would be foolishness and a sign of weakness. You can mistreat people when necessary, know that you are better than them, underestimate them where needed, insist on doing things the best or right way – which is your way – and be overly confident. 

You must stay independent from those who are closest to you, be they your spouse or partner, children, siblings, or parents. They cannot know as much as you do or influence you. That would be weakness. You must not communicate, compromise, or show compassion, since that would signal weakness to them. You need to do most of the thinking in the relationships with the people who are closest to you, so everyone can be protected by your wisdom. I help you to insist on your partner becoming as much like you as possible in his or her approach to things, so your partner can be a better person—you.

You are to love yourself more than anyone else, someone others can love even more than they love themselves, and someone who is more important than everyone else. Recognize that all criticism of you is destructive, only intended to weaken you.  You must know that you are entitled to and deserve all of the love that others can give to you, love that you can use to further empower yourself.

If the content from this excerpt resonates, you can read further in The Two Voices Within to see if you are living any of the roles we discuss linked to higher ego power energy (Dictator, Rebel, Narcissist, Ultra-Competitor, Control Freak, Exploiter, Independent, or Bully). It is when we are living these roles some or most of the time that we are being most destructive to others and ultimately ourselves. Complementary material for those who would like to heal and bring their higher ego power into balance can be found in Ego Therapy: A Method for Healing Your Whole Self (Chapters 6 and 12) and EgoSpiritualism: Awakening to Your Human and Divine Self (Chapter 7). All three works in our trilogy are available as e-books on the Shop page here.

In peace and love,

Nick and Linda

Healing Yourself

Healing Yourself Within

We all have a tremendous capacity to heal from within. This capacity has been given to us by the “wisdom of the ages” and evolution. It is this wisdom shaped by the Love, Life, and Energy—God Is, that has fashioned our design over the past three million years even though we were born in the “recent” past. In this respect, we are very much alike. We need only to understand this inner capacity and tap into it rather than constantly looking for answers outside of ourselves. You can heal yourself with ego medicine, focused ego meditation, and sacred sound meditation. From the perspective of Ego, Spirit & You, your healing begins with the willingness to truly know yourself—humanly and spiritually!

A major contributor to healing yourself involves understanding your ego energy and bringing it into balance where needed. It is this energy which significantly impacts your success in the key life areas we discuss and the roles you are living. Ego Medicine involves getting to know what ego is and isn’t, tuning into your specific ego energy, and using ego related reality based thinking. Each of the books in our trilogy—Ego Therapy, EgoSpiritualism, and The Two Voices Within are intended to help you with doing this.

Our six Focused Ego Meditations provide an opportunity to reflect upon the transformation and healing of your ego energy as you are bringing it into balance with ego medicine. The “Roles People Live” page on this website can help you determine which ones you will want to listen to. During a meditation, you will look into the “mirrors” of your life involving the key life areas and reflect upon the positive changes you are making as well as those which need to be made. It is from these reflections of healthy, balanced ego energy at work in your life that you can know how far you have come in your journey.

Our Energy Expansion Meditation uses the healing sounds of crystal singing bowls to promote balance and harmony. This guided meditation along with other spiritual tools including prayer, yoga, mindfulness practice, humor, and healthy patterns of exercise, diet, and sleep are opportunities to heal from within. We refer to them as spiritual tools because they resonate with the intelligent design we have been given by the wisdom of the ages to heal from within. This healing allows for us to call upon ourselves and has no earthly requirements placed upon it involving ample time and money, the need to seek healing from others or travel elsewhere, or higher intellectual capacity. Our work contributes to their use when one’s healthy, balanced ego energy allows for stillness and peace, optimizing their availability to us.

In peace and love,

Nick and Linda

God is not a who!

God is not a “Who!”

What a strange title for a blog. Strange for many because it acknowledges the obvious—God is not human. Strange because the thought is embedded in many of the religious teachings we have encountered over the years—God exists within the spiritual realm. Strange because we never refer to God in human terms—as having thoughts, experiencing feelings, having preferences, or taking action. Wait, Wait, Wait! There’s a problem with the last one and it’s also linked to the first two. Haven’t we heard references to God in written and spoken teachings that ascribe human qualities? Human qualities in which God has a gender (Him or Her), is loving or angry, rewarding or punitive, or has preferences attached to religious, political, or cultural approaches, even sports teams/accomplishments, to mention just a very few. God is not a who but every time we use references in which human qualities are connected directly to God that is exactly what we are doing. We are turning God into a who within our human frame of reference. Unfortunately, this has huge negative implications for our understanding of God. It sows the seeds for the conflict and destructiveness that has and continues to take place between people built upon defining who God is.

Many may think and respond by saying that human characteristics attached to God are just metaphorical or figurative and intended to help us to better understand God. Unfortunately, this understanding has two significant problems connected to it: 1) Metaphor is only helpful if one is able to appreciate and keep track of the abstraction involved and not convert it into a concrete, literal meaning. Failing to do so often leads one to cling tightly to the latter as it is often better suited to one’s cognitive and emotional “comfort zone.” This serves to make God extremely human and less spiritual to us even if we are not consciously aware of doing this. 2) Human characteristics attributed to God have often sown the seeds for divisiveness, particularly within and between religions. A divisiveness in which anger, hatred, and war have all occurred in the name of honoring what God “wants” from us. A divisiveness in which the Love, Life, and Energy—God Is within the fundamentally good, well-meaning, and intelligent participants has become lost and an absence of spirituality is being manifested.

If God is not a who then “what” is God? The what is, God Is—Love, Life, and Energy! Everything that was here and always here before humans, human consciousness and human frames of understanding God were formed by people. Love which is unconditional, unburdened, inexhaustible, and connective when we are being it. The life which recognizes the presence of God in all life forms honors all life and realizes the eternal nature of life when we are being it. The energy of light and truth, diverse in manifestation, transformative, and healing when we are being it.

From the perspective of Ego, Spirit & You when we manifest Love, Life, and Energy within our daily thoughts, words, and deeds, we are being what God Is.

In peace and love,

Nick and Linda

The brilliance of divine truth

The Brilliance of Divine Truth

The Brilliance of Divine Truth.: You have probably heard many people refer to being in search of the truth or their truth. A search that can often involve reading lots of books, attending various seminars, or finding teachers/gurus who may lead them toward it. A search that often involves a lot of time, energy, and money to find the “truth.” A search that is often fruitless as the person is often looking in the wrong places or people to find it. Divine Truth—the truth we are speaking of—is much simpler, more immediate, and consistently available to you. The Love, Life & Energy—God Is requires no greater intellect, education, or teacher to be known. Its brilliance is beyond the reach of any of those “requirements” to be known. You don’t even need to hear or read the brilliant words of the greatest consciousness teachers the world has ever known—Buddha, Jesus, and Muhammad—to know it. It is far less elusive than we humans make it out to be. As the great Islamic poet Rumi stated, “What you seek is seeking you.” The Love, Life, & Energy—God Is, is seeking you!

The question you may have if you are not being Divine Truth within your life is, “Why am I having a difficult time knowing and living this Truth?” Part of the answer involves the “demands and requirements” you are placing upon yourself to connect to this Truth. You are bypassing the simplicity, immediacy, and consistency of the Love, Life, and Energy that is staring you in the face. As an example, begin to recognize the “Godness” in every living thing you encounter—person, animal, plant, insect—as without God’s presence within their being they could not be or exist, nor you. Life cannot be without God’s presence within it as God Is—Life. Very simple, Very immediate, and Very consistent, with no burden being required to establish this awareness.

One other important influence that can make Divine Truth elusive for many to connect to is one’s ego energy. The more imbalanced it is in its power, flexibility, or vulnerability, the more distant one becomes from human truth. Attempting to find Divine Truth through faulty human truth and beliefs is a fruitless and empty exercise. An effort that often embraces egoic illusions of separation, inequality, and unworthiness which weakens one’s ability to witness the Love, Life, and Energy which surrounds them and is within them. Vivid examples of this can be seen in historical occurrences of religious intolerance and conflict, the need to fight battles to establish racial, religious, gender, and sexual orientation equality, as well as terrorist groups such as ISIS. The Love, Life, & Energy—God Is, shares no common ground with any of that. Healing one’s ego energy where needed in its power, flexibility, or vulnerability opens the door wide to the Divine Truth which is and has always been seeking you. No matter who or where you are.

In Peace and Love,

Nick & Linda

Ego & Spirit - To be or not to be

“To BE or not to BE”

“To BE or not to BE”: One of the most famous, often spoken questions, is the opening to Hamlet’s soliloquy, in which he ponders the choice between life and death—to be or not to be. A choice in which one can face the incessant challenges of the darker side of life or opt for the “freedom” but unknown opportunities of death.  A choice between the known aspects of one’s life situation and the unknown possibilities beyond this life. A choice between the inaction of continuing to live while mired in the circumstances of one’s life or action in choosing to move beyond them to those unknown one’s which may lie beyond the earthly realm.

With all due respect to Shakespeare, one of the most brilliant and eloquent writers who captured the human experience that we have ever known, his question via the proxy of Hamlet and its contemplation is much to narrow. His characterization of life (to be) is much too dark, empty, and fatalistic. It speaks to only helplessness within the human condition, which raises the plausibility of death at one’s own hands as the answer. A life which does comport to the ones being lived by those we have met who would summarily describe their life as “poor” or “fair.” The question leaves them with no option within the living realm. It offers no genuine hope for those who choose to remain in their earthly life and move beyond it –here!  It also bypasses those who have found their way to the “good” and “great” versions of themselves and life. The ‘to be’ in Hamlet’s question is intended to represent life but in many respects describes a lifeless life and offers no recognition of the options and answers to be found within the human and spiritual realm—to Be.

From the perspective of Ego, Spirit & You, the real question is, “To BE or not to BE?”  A question which involves choosing between a life-full (to BE) or lifeless (not to BE) existence—here and now! A question in which one has come to fully know the word BE. A recognition in which BE and its “cousins” being and becoming, come forth when one’s ego energy is in balance. This balance of power, flexibility, and vulnerability, allowing one to share control and influence with life and others, ability to adapt to the ever changing nature of life, and ability to healthily work with the imperfections of oneself, others, and life. A person with healthy ego energy would never find their way to alternatives to living—be it Hamlet’s or our version of ’not to be’. We can also BE in the recognition of the Love, Life, and Energy—God Is within our being, and the Great Gifts of Life, Creating Life, Eternal Life, and God Within, that everyone who has ever lived have been given.

“To BE or not to BE”—that is the real question!

In peace and love,

Nick and Linda

Nonreligious spiritually connected

Nonreligious-Spiritually Connected

Nonreligious-Spiritually Connected: We recently read an interesting article Millennials and religion: The great disconnect (Pittsburgh-Post Gazette/12-13-15) that focused on the relevance and relationship that religion has for individuals 18-34 yrs. old. There were various studies quoted involving declining trends in religious involvement for these individuals across religious denominations. Also there was mention of various reasons for this occurrence such as perceived conflict between religion and science, perceptions of religion as too constrictive and conservative, and perception of church teaching as hypocritical. To those we would add the destructiveness and war which has often occurred in the name of religion throughout history, has turned many people off to it.

A “positive” reason that was not mentioned is that many people, particularly younger ones, no longer view religious involvement as a pre-requisite to their relationship with God. Many consciously or intuitively sense the ability and necessity of establishing their own personally defined relationship with God—which is the essence of spirituality. They are the ‘nonreligious-spiritually connected’ and their numbers are growing. Interestingly, within the above-mentioned lengthy article the words spirit and spirituality never appear. We found this remarkable for an article focused on religious participation. To the degree that this occurred due to the understanding that religion and spirituality are synonymous, there needs to be a great deal of clarification in order to understand what is transpiring in this aspect of life for many millennials and people in general.

From the perspective of Ego, Spirit & You, religion continues to have an important place. We still need it to play its role in the current stage of evolution as we strive to awaken humanly and spiritually. Religion can be a beautiful bridge to our spirit and spirituality when the words spoken by clergy and messages presented within writings and actions are filled with helping us to know the Love, Life, and Energy—God Is within ourselves and fellow man.

In peace & love,

Nick and Linda

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